Causes of relationship Failure
We live in the 21st century where relationship failure has become very rampant.
A century dominated by exhilarating speeds, cutthroat competition and instant gratification. We are faceless individuals in an ocean of anonymity.
Marks, GPA, Facebook likes, frequent flier miles, ranks, ratings, mph – its funny how our existence and worth as human beings have been relegated to a few integers. Life was never this complicated. The life in the fast lane has made us complicated and relentless.
A few things however, remain the same. The latent desire of every human to have meaningful romantic relationships still remains at large within every individual. But modern civilization makes it a much bigger challenge than it ever has been even when both individuals want to make it work. This article highlights a few of the reasons relationships fail nowadays.
This comes in the top of the list for obvious reasons.
Trust is the concrete that holds together the two pillars of a healthy relationship: safety and security. Without trust everything’s bound to fall apart sooner or later.
Trust issues can arise from a variety of reasons. Sometimes the past of a person, be it a past relationship or some other traumatic memory, plays a major role in the origination of acute trust issues. Unresolved issues and lack of closure in a past relationship entraps a person in a never ending self destructive loop of doubt, aggression and lack of trust.
Sometimes letting go of past grudges is the only possible way of having a meaningful relationship in the present.
Jealousy, over possessiveness, orthodox mentalities, infidelity, overall unreliability and mutually exclusive goals also create significant moments of tension among couples.
It’s all rainbows and flowers the first few months of a relationship when nothing seems to matter and no force seems to be powerful enough to come between both of you. Time progresses.
Slowly but surely, the rose tinted glasses come off and the rift between the relationship expectations of the two lovers become increasingly apparent.
The expectations, be it emotional, physical, economic or something else entirely always creates tension within the couple.
Constructive discussions and minor compromises on both ends can however, ameliorate the situation.
LEVEL OF SERIOUSNESS
This is something couples should hash out at the very beginning of the relationship to avoid complications and broken hearts later on. The emotional requirements of every individual varies from time to time and depends on a wide range of factors including how satisfied he/she is with life, how close he/she is to his/her life goals and what his/her current emotional and social demands are. So both the individuals in a relationship might not be looking for the same thing in the relationship and by extension, in each other.
One might be looking for a lifetime commitment while the other wants to take it slow.
This is a recipe for Armageddon!
So knowing exactly what your partner wants will not only keep things smooth going but it’ll also prevent miscommunications in the future.
Unfortunate as it may sound, economic and monetary factors have claimed many a relationship.
When both partners have comparable incomes and social backgrounds this factor doesn’t come much into play.
However when there’s a sharp difference in the socio-economic positions of the partners, resentment builds. The resentment can be a direct result of a feeling of inferiority, jealousy and even lack of financial independence.
Sensitive issues like these need to be dealt with utmost care. It’s very important to make your resentful partner understand that your love for him or her is much deeper than the socioeconomic position he or she enjoys.
This is one of the most elementary reasons lovers drift apart over the course of time.
Maybe his job is the most important thing going on in his life, right now.
Maybe she prefers spending time with her best friends than you.
Maybe she prefers spending some of her time alone each day whereas you want to spend every minute of your day with her.
These stark differences in priorities can lead to much resentment over a course of time.
A healthy relationship is one where both partners maintain a healthy degree of communication with each other.
A relationship without communication is somewhat similar to a platoon of soldiers entering enemy territory without their radio communication systems.
You might be independent. You might enjoy your own company but not communicating clearly with your partner will sooner or later force him/her to question his/her role in the relationship.
Having said these one cannot conclude before stating that love, commitment and the willingness to be together in thick and thin can overcome the odds and lead to a relationship that lasts a lifetime.