Why Does It Hurt So Much?


I’m hurt so bad, my fiancee left me for her best male friend. I don’t know why I couldn’t get over it.

My performance at working is depreciating, I can’t think straight, I get angry at anything. I feel like crying all the time.

Why does it hurt so much? I enjoyed every minute of our relationship, she was perfect, she was not a gold-digger because she is independent.

It has been 7months, its time enough to heal. I still tell people she is my fiancee because we still communicate but not about relationship.

I ended all communication last 2months but still I can’t stop thinking of her, I find if hard to sleep everynight, I tried asking others girls out but the zeal wasn’t there.

Why does it hurt so much?

Dee: It is normal to be hurt when someone you love leaves you, its normal to feel pain when you are left to yourself. It’s normal to be disappointed and heartbroken when someone does something you least expect. It’s perfectly normal, accepting this fact is the first step to moving on. To your question, the reason why it hurts so much is because you feel you have lost someone of very great value. Someone who apparently has more value to you than anyone else, perhaps even more than yourself. It hurt so much because you suddenly forgot along the way that she is human capable of disappointing, capable of making mistakes, capable of changing. You held her at such a great esteem that you lost touch of your own self esteem. While nurturing her, you forgot completely about yourself, and now she is gone, you feel you are also gone.

But, there is still hope. You can regain your self worth, you can regain your life back, you can take charge of your life by realising you also have great value. You have to tell yourself you are worthy. You have to tell yourself you are a good man who deserves a woman that can appreciate what is good. You have to help yourself by bring back your self worth. Look into the mirror and say to yourself things that are bold and encouraging, say to yourself in the mirror "you don’t deserve to be hurt this way! You deserve a good woman!! You deserve someone who can appreciate your great value!!! You shall not be sad!! Do it, it works like magic, its reasuring, it releases the tension. She left, its her loss not yours, another woman who will appreciate you will come your way.

No body has the right to take away your happiness, give another person the chance to change everything and don’t expect too much from anyone. Be ready for anything. Be strong because that’s what life is all about. Being strong in order to survive. Take care of yourself.

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Post Author: Dr Dee

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